Write the Vision
There has been a lot going on in the past year, not the least of which is that I stopped studying at Bethany Theological Seminary after completing the requirements for my certificate, forgoing (for now) continuing on into the MA program in Theopoetics and Writing. (I still believe I am meant for that at some point, but God clearly told me, “not yet.” So I wait.)
One of the things God has been teaching me since last January is that waiting does not have to be idle. Waiting is not “sit still and do nothing.” Waiting is a kind of preparation period. So, in my time of waiting, I have been taking classes with my church district to complete the educational requirements necessary for (eventual) ordination. And I have been trying to figure out how to use this writing thing God has given me as a practical form of ministry.
Somewhere in the last 6 months or so, the idea came to me to start a church magazine. We’d take submissions from anyone in the congregation or church community who has something they want to share. I would edit it all and format it into a snazzy mag that would then be distributed as a PDF (because WHEW PRINTING COSTS, amirite?). But the point is that it would be a way for regular people, not just clergy, to speak, to share, to uplift and exhort and teach. Whether it is a devotional, a personal essay, a testimony, a piece of art or photography, a poem, a short story, or even a recipe, I firmly believe that all of us are called to share and speak in some way, though those ways may be different, and that often, the format of church as we currently know it may prevent some people from feeling that their voices can be heard.
So I am currently in the midst of putting together our first issue of the church magazine, and I was going through some old writing folders on my computer to see what I might be able to pull from my own pieces. And I happened to come upon this single devotional thought, which I had apparently written a little over 5 years ago and then forgot I wrote.
There is a history behind this. Years ago, this verse from Habakkuk showed up on my Facebook newsfeed, shared by my friend Lisa. It struck home. And then, I shared it with my best friend when he needed encouragement in his own period of waiting and writing. It has since become what I have dubbed “the football verse,” because we will throw it back and forth to each other when needed, when the temptation looms over us to give up on the writing, when the waiting seems too difficult, when we start to think maybe we misheard God.
I didn’t realize how badly I needed to read my own devotional today. But it struck home, and so I’m sharing it here in case anyone else is also feeling like they’re in a period of waiting, uncertainty, maybe even doubt, as to what you’re supposed to be writing (or doing).
And the Lord answered me:
“Write the vision;
make it plain on tablets,
so he may run who reads it.
For still the vision awaits its appointed time;
it hastens to the end—it will not lie.
If it seems slow, wait for it;
it will surely come; it will not delay.
(Habakkuk 2:2-3, ESV)
How often I have grown impatient because I knew there was a story I was meant to tell, but I couldn't figure out how to tell it. The words just wouldn't come. And so I'd sit at my desk and doodle character sketches, or maps, or think about how a character would act in a certain situation. I never thought of this as "writing" because, well, I wasn't actually writing.
"If it seems slow, wait for it;
it will surely come; it will not delay."
If God has put something on your heart, words that need to be etched into paper and shared with other eyes, with other souls, those words will come. It is easy to fear that the promise will never be fulfilled, that the thing we desire most will slip through our grasp. Many people before us have fallen prey to the selfsame temptation: Abraham and Sarah, Jacob, Zechariah. Many have manipulated events to try to bring about this gift or promise themselves. But if it is something that God has called you to do, then God will bring it to you at just the right time. I think that's what "it will not delay" means here. It doesn't mean you won't have to wait - it means it will not fail. It will happen at "its appointed time." That story that's burning in your soul? It's coming. It's coming. And you have the vision, swirling inside you, haunting your thoughts. You know the story is there, shrouded and waiting. Waiting for God to pull it out of you.
This is not an idle waiting. God tells you to "write the vision." Whatever you see, whatever you know, write it down. Make notes. Make doodles. Make scribbles. Think and envision. These things will not be in vain. They are the preparation for the deep work of pulling the story from your bones, of weaving together a story that is born of the colors of your soul.